You Had Me @ Hello

So there's this boy. Let's call him @.
I love @, and have done so for some time. However, I'm not dating @, I'm not his girlfriend, he has no commitment to me.
When I'm with @, it feels like nothing in the world could go wrong, but lately i can feel my chances with him slipping through my fingertips like a japanese silk scarf. Have you ever held Japanese silk? It feels like nothing. I'm beginning to notice that my relationship with @ really is silk; its nothing.
It kills me to feel this distant from the one I love, when he is so close.